The Princess and the Frog
By Mindy Erickson The fairy tale is as old as time and its so simple. All we have to do is understand the metaphor to understand how men and women can have a great long-lasting relationship. The fairy tale begins with a frog that is not your typical frog. Apparently he was once a prince but due to some bad behavior on his part a wicked witch turned him into a frog. Whether the witch symbolizes his mother or a past romantic partner is irrelevant; the point is that the prince believes he was turned into a frog by the witch because he did something bad or wrong and it was the witch that made him feel inadequate by pointing out his poor behavior and reducing him to a frog. The witch knew he would only see his short-comings while in a different form; one that was not the way he thought of himself or comfortable with. The frog is now fearful of the power women have to reduce him to such a lowly being; the physical form given to him by the witch who thought his behavior was better represented by a frog instead of a handsome prince. The witch was not really wicked; she cared for the prince and her actions were to challenge him to grow and develop his character. The frog then had to take a good look at himself while living like a frog. He had no choice but to see himself as others saw him. He could not get away with the bad behavior he could as a prince because all the pomp and circumstance were no longer present to charm and distract anyone from who he really was inside. The frog had to focus on treating others as he would like to be treated. He was able to develop the compassion and empathy that escaped him as a prince when everything he desired was handed to him because of his status and good looks. He didnt appreciate what he had then because he didnt have to work for it. Enter the princess; a beautiful, smart, wealthy, well dressed woman that everyone admired. She was warm and genuine and appeared to have it all. She did not present herself to be incomplete or needy in any way just because she was not married. No, this princess was confident and secure and knew who she was. She came upon the frog by chance when she was out taking a walk and enjoying her surroundings, something she did every day. She was not seeking out anyone to fill a void; she was complete as is. She was a princess in every sense. When the frog spoke to her she was surprised because frogs could not speak. She did not question this but instead she listened to the frog and remained open-minded. She gave him the benefit of the doubt and after a while found him to be sincere and very likable even though he was a frog. Since the princess was as kind hearted as she was beautiful and confident, the frog desired her. As the story goes, the frog knew that if he got a princess to kiss him he would once again be a prince, but he could not reveal this secret or it would not work. The frog had to earn the kiss on his character alone. He was up to the challenge because he knew that one kiss from a princess would help him become all that he was capable of being, but he needed the princess to accept him as he was first. He had worked on his character and had become a true prince and now all he needed was to regain his human form to live out his dreams with the princess at his side, but he needed her to help make it happen or he would forever remain a frog. Since the princess was a self-aware secure and compassionate person it didnt bother her that she was enjoying the company of a frog. She was able to see past his ugly form and look deeper to find his true self. This is why she ultimately kissed him and to her surprise she found a handsome prince and together they lived happily ever after. So what can we learn from this fairy tale? Well first it doesnt have to be a fairy tale. Think of it as a metaphor to having the relationship you want. Lets face it; most men are frogs. The ones that do appear to be princes arent always so great once you get to know them on a deeper level, so they are really just frogs too. When you look beyond the surface of someones insecurities and inadequacies about themselves with compassion, you can see them differently and quite possibly for who they really are, but only if you are truly a princess and dont take it personally when your prince occasionally reverts to a frog. This means you know who you are; a princess - and you do not seek validation from him because you already have it from yourself. Its not always easy to spot a frog. Some have been frogs too long and are too negative and bitter about it to see that changing their ways will do them any good. They have become very skilled at presenting an image of a prince, but its only superficial and wont last once you get to know them. They will push you away when you start to get close enough to see them as the frog they are. They are arrogant but also deeply insecure that they are frogs and would rather pretend to be a prince than become one. The image they present is more important than actually becoming a prince again because they fear being vulnerable to a princess. It is not recommended that you beat yourself up over these frogs; there are plenty of other frogs out there that are willing to receive a princess and all that she has to offer. So how can you know the difference? As a princess who is secure and self-confident you should always trust your instincts. True princesses do not second-guess themselves or let a frog cast self-doubt upon her. If you feel the frog has done something to violate your personal beliefs or boundaries then speak up - have an opinion. This doesnt mean you should scold or reprimand the frog because he cant help being a frog sometimes. Instead you can gently and respectfully tell him what your boundaries are and how you expect to be treated. If he cant accept your standards after youve compassionately expressed them then he cannot see you for the princess that you are. He may be a frog that only feels comfortable around other frogs and may be trying to make you feel like a frog to feel better about himself. If he cant measure up to a princess and become a prince in her presence then he will always be a frog. The fairy tale is actually the reality about men, how women respond to them and how that can make or break a relationship. As women we were created to love, nurture, and inspire. We have a huge amount of empathy and compassion for others, especially our children but also our romantic partners. Just as we are hard-wired for this, men are not. They are capable of all these things, but it doesnt come to them as instinctively as it does for us and especially not without our constant encouragement, compassion and respect for who they are. Sometimes its hard to keep from pointing it out when your prince is acting like a frog but we must strive to inspire them to be the prince we know they can be while always remembering that we are a princess and deserve to be treated as such. Mindy Erickson is a single mom of four living in Colorado. She is a frequent contributor of articles relating to her experiences and observations as a single mom. You can read more of her articles on her website http://www.othersinglemoms.com and learn more about Mindy on her blog http://www.singlemommindy.blogspot.com Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Mindy_Erickson http://EzineArticles.com/?The-Princess-and-the-Frog&id=448871 ativan xanax prescriptions online buy xanax 2 mg without prescription safe online purchase of xanax buy brand name xanax
